In Your Shoes
This is something I learned as recently as two weeks ago. A comment was made to me by somebody I thought understood the challenges I was facing in my life and why I mess up so frequently. They had always given the impression of empathy which I thought made sense because they too had faced very difficult moments in their life.
However on this occasion, they showed none of this and I was shocked. Suddenly in that moment I was being told that I was using my experiences as an excuse. There was no possibility for explanations and the invitation for discussion was shut down. Their mind was made up and that was it.
It took a couple of days for me to fully understand but one morning I woke up and I completely understood why they had said what they did. They were making a comparison and had concluded that my pain was not as deep as theirs.
When we get too caught up in our own trials and the severity of our situation can become so overwhelming and never ending that sometimes the only way to find some relief is to look at what others are going to gain perspective on our own situation. While this can inspire us to progress it is also important to remember there usually is more to any story than meet the eye.
Measuring your life against another may not always be the best thing to do. It can leave you feeling more despondent than ever if you feel that somebody else is managing to overcome something greater than you.
As much as we would like to avoid difficulties and pain, in retrospect we are always greater for the experience whatever it may be.
For some that may mean getting a job, leaving an abusive relationship, overcoming a serious illness or managing to become debt free. While some may appear more critical than others they are relative to the experience of whoever is facing them. Even the richest person in the world has problems.
You may ask yourself why you are facing another challenge when it seems that others have none or feel useless because there are people working through what may seem like bigger issues than yours.
It is important to focus on whatever has been placed in front of you and know you can come through it and be better for it.
We are never given more than we can handle.
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