I have long held an image in my mind of the superior expression of myself. Maybe you have too?
Most of my past frustrations have stemmed from being treated as a lesser version of that person and the responsibility rests squarely with me.
I have been too fearful to step into those shoes because on a deep level I have known that it may involve a change in the people I associate with and I am never good at goodbyes.
Even when they are for the best.
The opinions of others has had too great a hold over me. When I assess the credentials of the voices I have listened to the most I find them wanting. I am saddened that I lost so much trust in myself.
I cannot continue to avoid the constant visions and signs that I need to change. It is absurd for me to expect to achieve all that I can feel/see is possible by clinging to the low grade version of myself that I have adopted. The results are not satisfactory.
Change is happening. Not everybody is going to like it and it doesn't matter to me.
I am becoming H.E.R. My Higher. Energetic. Resonance.
Who and what is H.E.R?
You could say she is an Alter Ego, although I do not like the 'E' word.
She looks good and feels good. She is fearless and in control. She moves as effortlessly as a hot knife through butter.
Her conversation is precise and intelligent. She is direct.
There are no visible inhibitions to H.E.R. To quote Abraham Hicks she is 'Tuned in, tapped in, turned on.'
Even though all of her actions come from the heart she will be misunderstood, challenged and envied, which will secretly amuse because she knows the truth of the journey she has taken.
To me there is a lightness, a freeness, a shedding of self imposed shackles. A perceivable ramping up in energy.
Before a show most performers experience anxiety and unfortunately this has been named Stage Fright, so of course when this feeling hits you almost enter into battle.
What about rethinking this?
It is an unusual thing to step out in front of people and your body has this awareness.
What about thinking that all it was trying to do is prewarn you about where you need to raise your energetic levels to in order to successfully complete the experience?
If you were to move into this Higher Energetic Resonance - become H.E.R. - you would have the trip of a lifetime.
This reframing has worked for me. It is like learning a new skill, like driving. Initially it is intimidating and efforts are clumsy but I can now find myself in places that I never knew existed.
Both physically and mentally.
As this project commences and I present myself to the world, now more than ever I need to be steadfast and sure of my ideals. To both enjoy the experience and to instill confidence in future collaborators.
H.E.R. is a possibility for all of us. Male and female. You will probably find that those who criticize you the most are the ones who respect you the most. You are just showing them who they can be and they are not ready to make the leap.
Until the next time.
As always I am thankful for you reading my words. Please share. ;)