Construct From The Criticism

Opinions. Everybody's got some. 

Experienced, informed feedback, often called constructive criticism can be an appraisal of your work to date with suggestions that will assist you achieving a greater standard. Blatant criticism is often spouted from the ignorant mouths of those who think that you would benefit from their 'honest' and usually spiteful assessment. It is usually delivered with a semi grimace and whiny,  'I'm just sayin.'  

Plunging the knife in and turning it slowly never created anything other than pain. Human nature is such that even after receiving a multitude of thanks and praise it will be the sole negative comment that reverberates. Why? When it took no greater a moment in time to deliver than the positive words you have received. 

What is it about negativity that burns into us and makes us question ourselves? 

Why should we think there is less integrity in positivity? 

I recently was accused of lecturing somebody. Initially I was put out by the statement but then I took a beat and thought about what I had been trying to communicate to the person. 

They had a problem that was causing them, and me, some discomfort. The solution seemed obvious to me, I offered it. 

By taking a moment I stood in the other persons shoes. The problem formed their definition of themselves, their 'poor me.' and my advice was interpreted as an attack in their character. 

What they wanted was not a solution but company in their misery and I was not prepared to go there. 

Being called a lecturer sparked an idea in me. People get paid for this stuff and I know a few things...

Lightbulb moment. Thank you! 

Another one that often gets slung in my direction is, 'You're too sensitive/emotional'.

This used to really bother me until I realised that this is actually one of my greatest assets. If I can empathise then I have real experience to pull from in my work. If I do not feel my words as I write them they will only reach the listener as hollow token sentiments. 

Also to those who pass this judgement will appear unfeeling and callous to the over sensitive. #justsayin 

My often attacked stubborn streak is simply an impermeable tenacity misunderstood by those who lack the conviction to follow through on frequently sited grand proclamations and their frustration at my refusal to abandon my ideals. 

No bad thing. 

The most confusing of criticism comes dressed as a compliment, is worded like the highest of praise but you feel the conflicting vibration.  This can leave you puzzled and will generally come from your close circle. 

Coloured with admiration, envy and self hatred it will probably hurt the 

most. By improving, becoming more of you, you highlight the stagnation in the criticisers development. A barometer of your achievement although painful. 

As a creative you hold yourself up for criticism. The public measure of your work is opinion. Good and bad. In order to survive you need to be able to asses the motives behind every veiwpoint and use all to your advantage. 

As always...

Love Yourself! 


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